Brandy Ferner is a mother, wife, and the creator of the Adult Conversation podcast, social media pages, and blog. Her writing has been featured on Good Morning America, HuffPost, Romper, CafeMom, TODAY Parents, and more. In addition to writing and fulfilling her kids’ endless snack requests, she spent the past decade working as a doula, childbirth educator, and birth trauma mentor, ushering clients through the intense transition into motherhood. The insight gained from watching moms crack wide open—literally and figuratively—and her own experience as an independent woman who suddenly traded autonomy for snuggles, led her to say out loud the things that modern mothers are thinking. Sometimes it’s serious, sometimes it’s comedic, but it’s always honest. She currently lives in Southern California, and her love language is sleep.
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Check out Brandy's podcast!
April is a thoughtful yet sarcastic mother of two who tries her best to be a caring, connected mom in a middle-class culture where motherhood has become relentless. April rages at modern motherhood’s impossible pressures, her husband’s “Dad privilege,” and her kids’ incessant snack requests. She wants to enjoy motherhood, but her idealist vision and lived experience are in constant conflict with one another. Is she broken—or is motherhood?
Desperate for an answer, she seeks out a therapist, and lands with an unexpected woman whose validation and wisdom gives April the clarity to reclaim herself and even start designing clothes—her pre-motherhood passion. But when the ever-elusive babysitter cancels last-minute, April finds herself back at square one. She seeks guidance, but her therapist is now dealing with her own crumbling marriage—and instead of counseling April, she convinces her to speed off to Las Vegas with her to help catch her husband cheating. With a little weed, alcohol, and topless pool hopping, plus a male stripper and some much-needed autonomy, the two find lost pieces of themselves that motherhood swallowed up. But neither one is prepared for how tested—and tempted—they will be, or for the life-altering choices their journey will force them to make. Who is guiding whom anymore? (Courtesy of Amazon.)
“Ferner nailed it in this sharp-witted debut about the roller coaster ride that is motherhood. Her observations are not only relatable and authentic, but laugh-out-loud funny. You will not be able to put it down, just like your children.”
Emily Liebert, USA Today bestselling author of Pretty Revenge
In one sentence, tell us what your road to publishing was like.
The most amount of hustling amid rejection that I’ve ever had to do.
How are you similar to or different from April?
April and I are similar in almost every way, but she is the version of me from about five years ago when I started writing the book. Since that time, I have gotten clearer about boundaries and speaking up for what I need, whereas April is learning how to do that for the first time in this book.
If Adult Conversation were made into a movie, who would you cast in the leading roles?
Because I’m a mom and haven’t seen a non-animated movie in years, my mind goes to Parker Posey circa early 2000’s to play April! Ideally, April's role would be played by someone quirky, real, and with a comedy background - possibly Kristen Wiig. For the June character, Emma Stone comes to mind.
What are you doing for self care during the quarantine?
As someone who feels conflicted about the idea of self care for moms - which often feels like an idea that’s being sold to us so that we will just take care of ourselves and stop demanding actual policy change and equal rights - I have to say that my form of self care right now is asking for help from my kids and husband when I feel like I’m shouldering too much of this pandemic burden. That, and not doing any of my first-grader’s “optional" schoolwork.
What is the last book you read that you would recommend?
I was lucky enough to be an early reader for the book Motherwhelmed: Challenging Norms, Untangling Truths, and Restoring Our Worth in the World by Beth Berry, and it had so much nurturing insight, vulnerability, and validation. It led me to lots of epiphanies, and crying. It has a brilliant way of offering overworked mothers an inspiring and do-able blueprint for their own peace, healing, and relief from care-taking overwhelm.
What is the most recent bit of good news that you have heard?
That my case of Cup of Noodles just shipped from Amazon!
Thanks to Brandy for visiting with us and to Books Forward for sharing her book with our readers.
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7 comments:
Some good news I heard and saw via video recently is my 8-month-old nephew clapping and moving to the music of an interactive toy I bought him!
Dealing with an ex and divorce; taking care of yourself while doing that. Health concerns. Just the usual conversations.
What's for dinner
Gambling problems
The work that needs to be done around the house this summer.
Lol about cleaning the litter boxes.
I’ve had very few actual conversations, with anyone... I haven’t been getting along with person I live with for a long time, so it’s mostly been brief and terse exchanges. This morning I confronted him (again) about not taking any safety precautions when he leaves the house— he leaves and returns at least once a day.
—Ann
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